Fringeville #201: Remembering Will Rogers

One of the baked-in problems of political humor is that it’s quickly dated. A joke that brings the house down today might have folks scratching their heads a decade later. Another issue is that political humor these days divides. Half the audience laughs, and half the audience is offended. It seems to be a career track fraught with danger.

But consider the case of Will Rogers. He was born on November 4, 1879 in the Cherokee nation. He had a quite a slate of careers. He wrote. He acted. He did Vaudeville. He was a cowboy. Frankly, he didn’t sit still much. He is best remembered these days for his political humor. He died in 1935, yet his political humor is as spot-on today as it was when he was entertaining America early in the last century.

Here is a sampling of gems from a fellow who could get the whole audience to laugh. I'd have waited until August 15 (the date of his death) to post this but America needs stuff like this right now. We need to be able to laugh at ourselves and with each other.

Enjoy.

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"...Never blame a legislative body for not doing something. When they do nothing, they don't hurt anybody. When they do something is when they become dangerous."

"...Our president delivered his State of the Union message to Congress. That is one of the things his contract calls for -- to tell Congress the condition of the country. This message, as I say, is to Congress. The rest of the people know the condition of the country, for they live in it, but Congress has no idea what is going on in America, so the president has to tell 'em."

"...The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, 'How is the president?'"

"...Democrats never agree on anything, that's why they're Democrats. If they agreed with each other, they'd be Republicans."

"...As a young boy, I didn't know a Republican from a Democrat, only in one way: If some man or bunch of men rode up to the ranch to sit or stay all night, and my Father set me to watching 'em all the time they was there -- what they did and what they carried off ...I learned they were Republicans."

 

"...Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated."

"...Their greatest trait to recommend the Democrats is optimism and humor. You've got to be an optimist to be a Democrat, and you've got to be a humorist to stay one."

"...Congress is so strange; a man gets up to speak and says nothing, nobody listens, and then everybody disagrees."

"...I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts."

"...There wasn't any Republicans in Washington's day. No Republicans, no Boll Weevil, no income tax, no cover charge, no disarmament conference, no luncheon clubs, no stop lights, no static, no head winds. My Lord, living in those days, who wouldn't be great?"

"...There is something about a Republican that you can only stand him just so long; and on the other hand, there is something about a Democrat that you can't stand him quite that long."

"...The 'Ways & Means Committee' is a committee that's supposed to find the Ways to divide up the Means."

"...Politics is the best show in America. I love animals and I love politicians, and I like to watch both of 'em at play, either back home in their native state, or after they've been captured and sent to a zoo, or to Washington."

"...I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat."

"...Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even."

"...America has the best politicians money can buy."

"...A fool and his money are soon elected."

"...The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets."

"...This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer."

"...Congress meets tomorrow morning. Let us all pray: Oh Lord, give us strength to bear that which is about to be inflicted upon us. Be merciful with them, oh Lord, for they know not what they're doing. Amen"

"...Many a politician wishes there was a law to burn old records."

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Be good to each other.

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